It's an addiction

Here I am at the library on Monday AGAIN. Actually, my card wouldn't let me on a computer because I was already on today so I stole my mom's computer after she finished with hers.
I went to check on the modems at a different place and found one for 25ish dollars. So I ordered one of those - apparently they aren't as good - but whatever, I'm not looking for high-end equipment, just something to do the trick.
See, the internet... It's my caffeine, or nicotine, or even alcohol. I just can't live without it. I'm not sure when I developed this dependence, but it's pretty bad. I think right now, after mom picks me up - I'll go back to the cottage and make dinner (can't live without my food), then I'll temporarily set the internet up on my sisters computer so I can use it before the modem comes in. Wait, no, that's a bad idea. I should try to live without the internet - it's just that when I'm at the cottage it's my primary means of communication with my friends and without it I feel so alone. All I have are my books. :-P
I don't like days off. It gives me too much time to think. I don't want to think about anything lately, all it does is make things more difficult. I'm looking forward to work tomorrow, even if I have to wake up at 5:30 so I can be there by 6:30 - *shudders* They better not make me do the onions.
Back to my addiction. I'm not even sure what I do when I use the internet, I'm on msn, but half the time I'm not talking to anyone, it's like I have this strange comfort of being online. Then I just play games or surf the net. But for some reason the gaming playing just doesn't feel the same as it does when I'm on MSN. Then, I presume that my addiction isn't directly to the internet but to MSN. However, that doesn't seem completely plausible because after I go on the library computers, which don't have MSN my addiction still feels satisfied. Weird. Maybe I'm more complicated than I thought. I can't even figure me out.